Pardon me for all the drama lately. It’s just that I really want to vent out my feelings in here. I’m just so stressed out, confused these past days and I really don’t know what to do or how to deal with the things that had happened to me several days back, that have caused me so much pain. It seems that I’m just all alone and there’s no one out there to confide to.

I’m constantly asking myself why is it so hard to be genuinely happy? I thought I would be happier if someone would come along. The perfect person that you could share your ups and downs in life with, and the one that could make things much easier for you, but what I’ve felt at this very moment is the exact opposite. I thought I would finally have the chance to feel the thing that I’m longing to feel for quite some time now, however, it’s the other way around. It’s definitely heart-breaking to realize that all he’d uttered weren’t really for real, and I already have accepted the fact that all of my sacrifices just to make everything work won’t really pay-off. I just hate this feeling and it’s torturing me. I want to cry my heart out just to ease the pain inside me. I feel sorry for myself for being this vulnerable and for being such a hopeless romantic type of girl.

I know in God’s perfect time, this too shall pass. I know moving on won’t just happen overnight but I believe I can do this. It wouldn’t be that easy but I have to be strong and just always believe that everything happens for a reason. I know God will unveil it to me at the right time. I’m looking forward to the day wherein I will no longer have a hard time wearing a smile on my face, and can genuinely tell the world that I’m truly happy and have moved on.

 It’s just so hard to deal with something that you don’t have enough idea at all if it’s really for real or not. But the sad thing here is that, you have learned to love, care, appreciate that certain individual, and your world is starting to revolve around that person. All you want to do is to cry out loud just to let the world know how hurt you are. You’re beginning to feel that you are all alone and there’s no one out there to talk to.

 One of the most anticipated events of the year is finally here! Merry Christmas everyone! Wishing each one of us would have a wonderful time and have a blast celebrating this special day, the birth of our saviour Jesus Christ with our loved ones.


Furthermore, make this day a memorable or meaningful one by spending some quality time with the people closest to our heart. This is one of the best days as well to say sorry to the people whom we've done wrong and show our appreciation to the ones who had made a mark in our lives in a positive way, and became a huge part or one of the big reasons why our 2012 has been an amazing year for us. I can honestly say that this is one of the best Christmas day ever for me since I have tons of things to be thankful for. I may not have all the finest things that this world can offer but I'm just so blessed to be surrounded with such an amazing people and this thing is already enough for me.

Happy Holidays everyone!

After several months of excitement, daydreaming and months of wondering, and pondering, things are now falling into place. And now, I can honestly say that the long wait is finally over.

Our grandparents are one of those people who can actually mold us to be the kind of person we can be in the near future next to our parents. They are also there 24/7 whenever you need them and welcomes you with open arms. They can be the type of person as well who will spoil you with so much love and care.

My grandparents are one of the most amazing people I have in my life. Nevertheless, this piece is all about my grandfather, whom I missed so much for years now. This is my little tribute to him, although he cannot be able to read this anymore but I know in my heart that he can feel and see what is exactly in my heart at this very moment. This is my little way of thanking him for being a big part of my journey through life back in my childhood years until this very day, wherein during those moments, you never failed in showing us how wonderful you are as a person.

 Lolo, you are not just a great provider and a father to your children but most importantly, you are the greatest grandfather in the world. I am just so fortunate to had a person like you who offered so much love, thus, when you were still with us, you made me feel happy and contented.

I remembered back then, when I was still at a tender age, I used to go to my grandparents’ house right after every school year and spent my whole summer vacation there. It was definitely a lot of fun since they had showered me with so much affection that is very essential to a growing child. That is why when I really had to go back home for the reason that it was already time to go back to school; my parents would had a hard time convincing me to go along with them. All I want during those times was to stay with my grandparents’ home. That is how close I am to both of them.

Moreover, I missed the old days when my grand father used to protect me from anything or anyone that can potentially hurt me. When I am with him, I feel so secured that no one can harm me when he's beside me. I missed the way he tells me how proud he is of me regardless of how little that achievement may be. I missed hearing him utter the flattering remarks about the way I look that I badly needed to feel good about myself and to boost my self-esteem. I will never ever forget how he said to us that he would rather want to carry all the pain that we have to go through in life, than seeing us in a difficult situation and in pain. Reminiscing that moment when he was saying those words while in tears is really heart-wrenching and can bring tears to my eyes.

I just wished that I still had more time to spend with him. But nevertheless, I know he is already happy wherever he is right now as he is now together with the Lord. I just want to tell my grandfather, my “lolo”, from the bottom of my heart, I love you very much. I appreciate all the amazing things you have done for us and I cherished those moments we had when you were still around us. I promise to take care of “lola” for the rest of my life. Your love and your memories always put a smile on my face and you'll forever be in our hearts.Thank you so much for all the love.

Bidding goodbye would be one of the toughest decisions to make but I believe that undoubtedly, it’s one of the wisest or smartest things to do, especially if you think or feel that the kind of relationship you are in would go nowhere to begin with. So, in order not to experience more pain within the relationship, I better bid goodbye rather than staying in a relationship that would just cause me so much pain, ‘coz that would be unhealthy.

                                               (  Photo Source: Google Images )

Additionally, I should have done this much earlier but the thing is, there’s this part of me a few months back that still wants to believe in that what you have for me, is just so genuine and for that reason, I can’t afford to just let go of you that easy, and I thought you’re one of the few people out there that is really into a serious thing/relationship. But now I just realized that all those stuff you uttered were just too good to be true and it’s really not for real. I thought you’re too kind and you’re not capable of doing such stuff that would make a girl upset. You’re doing it now though. Although I don’t have a proof yet but I can really feel that there’s something fishy going on behind my back. Yes, I’m to be blamed for the kind of scenario that I’m currently in. It’s pretty hard to do this and I’m weighing things now.

Moreover, I’m also wondering why you’re there, I mean what the heck are you doing in that place. I’m not that dumb not to figure things out, and you want me to believe that you’re just there ‘coz you’re eyeing something you think would be the best present for me or for your family or whatsoever? I wouldn’t buy it though. I’m not that st*pid to believe whatever you say. Just go and tell that to the marines instead. I regret everything I’ve done and I shouldn’t be in this tough situation if I just used my head and didn’t come-up with that dumb decision in the first place. I honestly just had no idea at all what I’m getting into a few months back. Having said that, I’m waiting for a sign later this evening though, and in the event that I wouldn’t hear anything from you or I wouldn’t get to hear those specific words from you tonight, then, that would be my last straw. I’ll be bidding goodbye already. I have to say goodbye while I’m not yet “falling” for you. You don’t deserve a girl that would be willing to sacrifice everything just for the sake of making a relationship work. And you’re not worth my mascara, dude. Just go and chase after her, I don’t give a damn. Good luck!

I've been very confused these past few days, and I actually don't know what to feel. Are those things you uttered a couple of days ago already a hint? I hope not, because I would really be disappointed with myself for not being smart enough, with the decision I had made 3 months back. I've been very negative lately and it's not a good thing. I have to stick firmly to that decision though and it scares me, since I have no idea at all if what to expect and what would be the consequences of such action.

Having said that, there's still a part of me who still wants to remain optimistic and wants to believe that everything will turn out well in the end. This is really a hard thing to deal with. I'm upset and a bit hurt, and I don't know why I do need to feel this thing. Am I really into you already, and I'm just trying to deny it to myself? Having this kind of feeling is such so tough because I really don't know if the kind of thing that we have right now, is indeed for real. I do hope that you're not like those guys out there who aren't genuine enough, which I'm going to find out a few weeks from now. So I need to prepare myself, my mind and my heart to whatever outcome may be, and be strong enough to handle everything if this certain thing will cause so much pain. But nevertheless, I'm hoping for the best.

I'm surprised to see that Blogger has a new look already. It's kind of nice, I'm just too used with the old one though. But I know I'll eventually get the hang of this one in the coming days. Anyway, it has been ages since the last time I wrote an entry in here, LMAO. I'm such a busy bee these past weeks with my online gigs and I have a lot of bills to pay that's why I need to work my butt off. Nevertheless, I'm just so in love with this personal blog that I wouldn't want to take this one for granted. I have invested so much time in here and I don't want that the energy I invested in here for years would be put to waste.

As what the title implies, I should update this blog more often since my blog stats lately worries me a lot. Yes, it worries me a lot. My blog traffic is dropping like a rock again. I have to emphasize the word again for the reason that I have experienced this thing a lot of times already whenever I didn't post a new entry for a week or 2. But this time around, it's a different thing or story already because there's this certain thing that I have noticed just this morning, and I'm hoping and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it's just a glitch or something. Even though that I don't have all the time in the world to invest in this blog, no matter how busy my schedule is, I should get serious with this one, and give more time for this blog in order to bring back what's missing in here.

There are certain decisions in life that you wouldn’t give a damn about the gravity of the consequences of your actions will be in the end, since you’re just so overwhelmed at that very moment you did that. Nonetheless, I’ve realized so many things now that I should have not said or done. I should have not uttered those words to begin with since those might leave a wrong impression about me. Maybe I’m just too comfortable with you as if I’ve known you or we’ve been together for years now. Sometimes I feel like you’re just too good to be true and certainly, there are several times I’ve asked myself “are you really for real?” and if it’s a wrong move, I hope it’s not.

I’ve been thinking so hard these past few days whether to do it or not. I’m really wanting to do something like this for quite some time now, but there are still a lot of things that keep me holding back. At the back of my mind, I do have doubts if I can really do it, if I can meet the expectations or not. I’m skeptical, pretty scared as I don’t want to give disappointments to the person who believes in my capabilities. I must admit that I’m not good at it and there are still tons of people out there that are definitely greater and smarter than I am, who can certainly do it much better than I do.  Having said that, I’m also thinking though that at this point in time, I really need to step out of my comfort zone and do something beyond the usual things that I do every single day, since this will truly help hone my skills, that would definitely be helpful in the long run.

Time just flies so fast I must say. In a few months time, or after a couple of months to be exact, I'd be able to see and feel the stuff that I've been wanting from this particular thing for months now.

Actually, in all honesty, I really don't know what to feel. It's actually a mix emotion. I'm quite ecstatic and pretty nervous at the same time and I'm pretty scared as well. I really don't know what to expect once we'll get to see each other. All I just wanted to happen is that to finally see you and let's see what happens after that. I just really want to know if how genuine you are, and if you're really a real deal, because at this very moment, I still can't say if you're really that sincere. I want to see and feel personally that you have invested so much time time and energy just to be with me. And yes, I'm still skeptical if I'm doing the right thing, and if you have good intentions towards me. I still have to remain positive though, and I'll keep my fingers crossed that everything will turn out the way I expected.

My mind is just so preoccupied with a lot of things lately, and I’ve realized tons of things, and one of which is that there are certain things in life that are definitely beyond our control. At times, we have never imagined even in our wildest dreams that we can do something or we can make a certain decision in life even in a short period of time or without even consulting the people closest to us. And not to mention, others would think that this certain action isn't really a great idea or would not help you in the long run.


But nevertheless, sometimes we have to take some risks and really hope for the best that this particular thing would turn out well in the end. If we think that doing it would genuinely make us happy, then we should go for it and would not allow anyone or anything to get in the way of real happiness that everyone of us truly deserves.
Moreover, I do admit that there were times that I'm kind of scared to welcome this particular idea but I believe that I wouldn't feel the real happiness in life if I'll be forever scared and wouldn't take some risks in life. I need to be mindful though in order not to commit the same mistakes in the past, and be more responsible and mature enough this time around.

As what I've mentioned in my previous post a few weeks back, I have made decisions these past weeks and one of which is currently preoccupying my mind if it's the wise thing to do. Yes, I know that some people would raise their eyebrows about this certain thing and I'm pretty sure that they would definitely say that it's not a bright idea, but nevertheless, at that very moment when I came up with that very tough decision, all I'm thinking was, I just have to go with the flow and I got so carried away by my emotions as well.

Moreover, I have noticed a lot of things lately and there was something that I've discovered just awhile ago. And because of this, this one is starting to give me a headache. It haunts me and I'm starting to feel that maybe it isn't really a great idea. Additionally, the very reason why I did that was simply because I just felt that it was about time to take a risk and I should get out of my comfort zone because I'm not that young anymore. Nonetheless, at the back of my mind, there are tons of things that keep me holding back but one thing's for sure, I just can't afford to lose it and to easily let go of this thing as it's starting to grow on me already.

In a few months time, the things that currently remain a mystery to me would finally be unveiled. I’m hoping that the stuff that I’ve been dying to feel and hear for months now, would finally be uttered and shown to me, so that I can definitely say that it’s indeed a real deal. That all of the time and energy that I’ve invested are truly worth it and absolutely worth the wait.

I really believe that there are huge reasons why certain things had to happen or why things didn’t work out. Yes, at first, it would be very difficult to accept why it had to happen, and it’s definitely very heart-wrenching to realize that you have to let go of that person and you have to move forward with your life without him/her. And it would be tougher, most especially, if your world only revolved around that certain person for quite some time, wherein you had learned to live life with him/her.

Nonetheless, I really believe that everything happens for a reason. Only God knows why He had to let you experience those heartbreaks and I’m pretty sure that the reason behind it is that when the time comes that when you have to look back, you’ll be very grateful to Him because He never allowed you to stay in a relationship that would not help bring out the best in you in the long run.

That said, I just want to share one of my favorite quotes and here it is..lol..



Like I said, there's definitely a reason why we need to go through all the pain or heartbreaks in life, and that is simply because He has a much better plan for you, it may seem ironic but we always have to believe that there's someone out there that would love you for the rest of your life, and would love you unconditionally.

There were tons of things that had happened the past month and a few of those things were the kind of stuff that I never imagined that were really possible. I must say that one of those stuff was really a pleasant experience. And because I was so overwhelmed with that particular thing, I did come-up with a decision that I really don't know if it was really the right thing to do. Additionally, after I did  that, I'm kinda scared if everything will turn out well in the end. I'm still hoping though that I won't regret every single thing that I had made these past weeks. But nevertheless, I need to prepare myself if one of those decisions I made won't turn out well.

Moreover, I want to really invest time and energy on one of those stuff but I'm still holding back since I'm kinda hesitant if it's worth my time and the effort. I would love to focus on that thing but there are still a lot of factors that I need to figure out or to consider first before I could actually invest time and energy into it,  because this time around, I really have to be careful and make sure that it is really something that would really bring out the best in me. I’m still waiting for the signs and I hope it won’t be that long.

Well, anyway, yesterday was one of the Holidays that Americans look forward to celebrate every year. So, belated Happy 4th of July everyone!

I really want to write here more often but I am not really in good shape these past few days. And right now, I don't really know what topic or stuff to jot down in here. I'm just so exhausted. I wanna travel, have a vacation for a week or two or even beyond than that, and just do all the stuff that I’ll definitely enjoy doing with my close friends, but there are tons of things that I need to consider first before I could actually do all these stuff. I'm just so burned out, and so freakin' tired. All I wanted to do is to reward myself for working this hard.

I just wish that I could treat myself one of these days since I badly need it and I honestly believe that I deserve it as well. And I'm hoping and praying that someday I could finally find that missing piece in my life, so that I would be more inspired to live each single day with so much joy. I'm hoping to find that true happiness that I've been longing to feel for quite some time now, and I'm wishing that it would happen anytime soon. I really, really hope so…

The past years, my life was like a roller-coaster ride. It was full of ups and downs. At times, you can’t help yourself but to be discouraged with so many negative things that you need to deal with. Looking back, I’m very glad that I was able to overcome those things and I’ve learned to move on and move forward with my life despite how tough those scenarios were. If I didn’t have the faith in God, I don’t know where I’m now.
In those trying times, I still remained hopeful that one day, all the efforts that I’ve invested will eventually pay-off and I’m right after all. I can truly say now that I’m starting to reap the fruits of my labor, and it really feels so great. Thus, this piece is just my way of thanking Him for all the blessings He had given me this year. These blessings definitely changed my life dramatically. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that in the near future, I would be able to fulfill my dreams and be successful with the stuff that I’m passionate about.

I'm one of those millions of people around the world who are just so ecstatic about the American Idol Season 11 finale results night later. I just can't wait to know who will win this season.

Additionally, according to the American Idolnet.com site, with over 18,000 votes in their poll, Jessica got a whopping 62% of the votes as of the writing of that article. That's definitely a lot of votes but anything can happen right?So this number can't definitely assure us that she will get the title. Nonetheless, let's just hope for the best.

Jessica Sanchez did a great job yesterday on the first and second round. I'm hoping that these performances yesterday night were enough reason for the Americans to see that she's indeed deserving to win. And hoping that majority of the Americans will get to realize that she undoubtedly has an amazing talent and incredible voice. Nevertheless, Phillip Phillips got a standing ovation from the judges too.So who will win this season? Well, we will find that out very, very soon.

Experiences in life whether it may be bad or good really help us or mold us to become the person that we are now. I must admit that several years back, I’m the one who’s so gullible, vulnerable type of person and would definitely believe most or part of a person was saying. That’s because I’m too young then, or we simply want to make ourselves believe that this particular person would willing to give us the attention that we are longing to have, or need. And I know most or some of you would agree with this.

It’s pretty tiring to work for 10-15 hours a day and 6-7 days a week I must say. But since I’m doing something that I learned to enjoy for months now, at times, working for several hours a day don’t matter to me at all. I can even work beyond that hours if necessary, that’s how passionate I am with my work now. That’s why I do believe that you should be working on something that you’re passionate about, since that will be the time wherein you’ll be more effective or efficient with your job and eventually be successful doing it, which is one of my ultimate dreams.

There's another reason for us Filipinos to celebrate since our very own Jessica Sanchez makes it to the top 3 of American Idol, along with Phillip Phillips and Joshua Ledet. A lot of Filipinos including myself were just so ecstatic upon hearing the result that she was able to make it to top 3, as what you can read on social media sites such as Facebook and Twitter. Here are some of the tweets:

Love indeed is the greatest gift that God has given to humanity. The sort of feeling that is certainly indescribable, that at times, words aren’t enough to describe what you actually feel for that particular person, for the reason that the love you have for that certain person is just so overwhelming that you can’t figure out the perfect word/s to describe it.

Additionally, love has the power to change the whole being of an individual, and make him/her the better person that he/she can be. And not to mention, it has the ability as well to inspire people to reach their certain dreams in life and motivate them to even reach those dreams or stuff that would seem unreachable for others, that is how powerful and magical this single word is.

A person that is genuinely in love is definitely the happiest person on earth, most especially if they are just so blessed to find that special someone who would truly love them and shower them each single day of their lives with so much love and care. If you have found not necessarily the perfect person, but rather a great individual that would love you the right way, surely, that kind of relationship you have with him/her will keep you grounded. This is the ultimate dream of most girls which is to finally find their dream guy, their knight in shining armor, wherein they could honestly tell the world that he is indeed the right one already.

Thus, if you are in love at this very moment, just enjoy this wonderful feeling, seize every moment of it with the person you love so dearly.

I have posted in my previous post that I was so overwhelmed with the sudden increase of my blog's traffic for a few days that had something to do with what I've written on that particular day, that was indexed right away by Mr. Google. I'm just so ecstatic that right after I wrote that entry, I've noticed a decent amount of traffic in my blog for 3 consecutive days.

It didn't normally happen that's why I'm overreacting to it(LMAO).And I know most of you who would get to read this entry would surely say the same thing(Lol).That's the very reason why back then, I really seized the moment and enjoying every moment of it. Whenever I'd seen hundreds of visitors per hour in my stats, I just can't help but be ecstatic about it since like I said, it didn't usually happen every single day in my blog. In fact,I'm actually wishing that I could still have the same amount of traffic in the coming days. However, I'm now back to reality (LMAO).From a whopping thousands of visitors in a single day, it's now down to hundreds of visits each day, which is already the normal stats of my blog.

Nevertheless, it's fine with me since I'm already used to that stats and that particular stats were just too good to be true (LMAO).It's still okay with me even though it's dropping like a rock (Lol). Maybe the best thing for me to do is to focus more in blogging and write more entries in this blog as much as possible and as much as I can, in order for me to reach that thousands of visits someday. Is it doable? Well, I'll just have to believe that it's really possible. So for now, I'll just keep on wishing that one day, I'll be able to achieve that particular amount of traffic,(LMAO) and to keep on working, and working hard on my blog as well.

I’m so ecstatic and surprised when I get to see this stats from my Sitemeter and I’m definitely loving it! And as a matter of fact, I’m seizing the moment since this thing won’t normally happen everyday..LMAO..

( Charice Pempengco's new look )

A lot of people were surprised when they get to see the new look, the new hairstyle  of Charice. Actually, I was quite surprised as well when I got to see the new Charice and when I noticed that she has a tattoo already, and I was like, "she really changed a lot!". I think the new look has something to do with her new image and the kind of songs that she will be singing in the coming months, which is something to look forward to.


Nevertheless,a lot of people have different opinions on her new look, there are positive stuff but there are also numerous comments that are not that good. When you'll get to read the tweets of netizens on twitter, you would definitely notice that the negative comments are just so overwhelming which is kinda sad.I happened to read some of the "not so good tweets" about the new look and I really feel for her. She's just doing her thing and doing the stuff that would genuinely make her happy.


For me, it doesn't really matter if what kind of look Charice would want to achieve in present time or in the future because the most important thing here is that her amazing talent. You're such a talented young lady so just continue to do your thing and continue to make us proud. There are still a lot of Filipinos out there that would still continue to support you all the way no matter what, since you never failed to surprise us, your Filipino fans, with your incredible voice.

 I know that all of you guys wouldn't get to read this piece since none of you knows what my personal blog is..LMAO..Since I'm not yet comfortable to unveil one of my comfort zones...LMAO...Nevertheless, I'll just say these things to you personally when we will have the time or whenever our schedules allow it to have a get-together and have a blast...

Well, anyway, this is my little way of showing how I truly appreciate the friendship and this is the least that I can do to say how I value the moments that we have shared even just for a short period of time...

First off, the very reason why I'm in that place was to work and do what I supposed to do, however, one day,I just found myself that I'm already with the people that later on would mean so much to me, that eventually became special to me.

Secondly, even though that I only knew you guys for like a short period of time, but the things, the laughters and the moments we have shared were enough to break the wall that I have set for myself for years now, and because of that, I'm more comfortable and at ease when I'm around you guys as compared to other people that I get to hang-out as well...

Additionally, I'll miss those days when we chose to hang-out or stroll around the metro first rather than going home and sleep after our graveyard shifts, which was truly amazing...we truly have an amazing energy to be able to do that after several hours of no sleep...LMAO...

To top it all of, I truly appreciate the friendship we have and I'm looking forward that one day, we still have the time to reach out to each other even if we won't be seeing each other that much...I hope that we can still have moments wherein we can still hang-out, enjoy that particular moment and do some crazy stuff..Lol....Seriously guys, I'll just want to say this, I'll definitely miss you....

It's been quite a while since the last time I posted here and I must say that I missed posting here. I'm just too busy these past weeks, that it took me a month to update this blog. And as a matter of fact this one is supposed to be written 2 weeks ago but due to my hectic schedule I wasn't able to write this one weeks ago.



Anyway, me and my friends were able to watch "Unofficially Yours" of John Lloyd Cruz opposite Angel Locsin few weeks ago. After hearing a lot of good reviews of the movie from our friends, we decided to watch it. And I must say that they are indeed right, you would really appreciate the movie and each of the characters of the film. I can honestly say that me and my friends were actually enjoying the film since there were a lot of funny scenes that you can't help yourself  from laughing.

It is definitely a good movie and I must say that Cathy-Garcia Molina really did a good job in directing the film. I must say that "Unofficially Yours" is truly a breath of fresh air. Kudos to her and to Angel and John Lloyd since they both nailed it, and to the rest of the cast as well.